Finding the BEST within me~ · Struggles~ · ~This Writing Life~

If we were having coffee on a summer eve~

IMG_3976If we were having coffee, I would introduce myself first. Hopefully, without fumbling an embarrassing beginning. You see, I am one of those shy, introvert types that does not often seek out others. Not on purpose. Usually.

This has caused problems in my life, I suppose. Although, traveling for the chairlift (ski)-building company while raising five children left me little time or need to bond outside the ranks of our group. While my house was full, the days flew by and it seemed all I did was talk. Talk Talk Talk…which left me with a momma’s vocabulary before I knew it. All good. It was enough. Plenty enough. How I prayed for a bit of quiet time! Once they flew the nest, and quiet could be had…well, now I cherish the silence.

If we were having coffee, I would ask you about yourself. (Isn’t this what you do, to start interpersonal conversations?). Your family and work….and of course, do you write? Do you paint? Forgive me, if I am being too personal…I am still trying to find my way in this ‘meeting new people’ stuff. I would tell you about my projects, (if you asked) and ask of yours. Do you struggle with writing? (haha!)….And how do you answer that ‘what do you do for a living” question when someone asks? If I say, “I am a writer..”, their next question is ‘are you published?” Um, well…yes and no.

I am currently back in school, and my first class was creative writing (natch)…which forced allowed me to do a bit of public speaking. Oh, the terror of those workshop discussions….This was good, in hindsight, although I was trembling through it all. Trembling is not a good look for someone of my age, amongst the youth!

In the middle of the night, I am often lying there keenly aware that I perhaps am sabotaging my writing career (out there in the big public), by this introverted shy nonsense. I know you must self-market, network, converse, TALK…to strangers about something that is part of your soul. Writing requires one to be available, accessible….

Oh, the stuff of nightmares~

HPen~

 

2 thoughts on “If we were having coffee on a summer eve~

    1. Tee hee!…well, it is easy to think such from your place now. I was a crazy nutcase back then, trying to keep them all going forward, avoiding calamity and doing homeschool. Fortunately…my expectations weren’t too high! ha!…just wait, you will look back and find that it didn’t seem so difficult all those growing-up years after all….:)….(I miss it dearly..)

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